.. #YOLO ..

.. it's been a while i haven't touch this page. got many stuff in my head, i can't even think where to start. the one that pop into my head now, many people asked me "why don't you have a boyfriend?" or "'till when you want to be single?" or "where is the invitation" and my response is still the same "is coming..."

for me, to be single is not a problem. because its really the time we have to get good at being alone. drive anywhere without anyone permission (of course, in my case i still need to ask my parents permission on this), shop anything without any hesitation from others opinion, watch any movies without any argument what movie that we want to watch, eat everything without asking any recommended places that one might want to visit?

I'm good at being alone i guess, but the question is that do I really want to be single? until when?
Because, most people told me there's a danger that i'll be so good at being single, so it will set my ways that i'll miss out the chance to be with someone great out there.

well, is not that i don't want to be commit with someone, its just my thought being committed will be the end of my "me time", travelling anywhere i want, or buying stuff whatever i want without anyone permission. Yea yea yea it sound like i'm controlling myself to much! but thats the fact thou.

if people asked "don't you missed some guy text or phone call to ask how are you? or how's your day? or even what's for lunch?" i might response "well, is not a genuine question for me!" why would some guy used those pick up lines to open a conversation? its 2016 .. do guys still used those pick up lines? i might be to hard on myself or some people say "I'm to independent" but in my defensed i tried to be on those guys shoes.

If they can treat women like that, where those question to guys seems to lame, i can be that person too? have you heard a guy who bluntly ditch a girl because she's to good? oh well who wants to date a bad person? or some guys ignoring phone calls or texts from a girl who wants to know whats happening with him, i can be that guy too ..

as for now, being single is not a problem or issue for me. I don't need to compete with anyone to have a plus one in myself. Yes, i'm looking but not desperate. i own social media but not for people to know that "i'm open market" i'm not against matchmaking process, but the way i see it the one who knows what i'm looking and what i need is myself not other people! so safe your time to find me the "right person".

i do believe, when the time is right the right companion is on his way! ..

.. Anonymous ..

.. for a minute it was looking like, will i end up seeing this guy in person? I spent my whole time looking for a perfect timing to meet him. maybe i'll never be satisfied, had a couple bad lucks in finding the right timing to bare with his busy schedule. now, that i'm looking for him, why is it so hard to find the right timing to meet him?

i thought i took one step, but then what i did i took two back. i'm not even close this time, that's the fact; all i know is that i want him, perhaps he can be the perfect match for me, with all the weird thing and all the absurd  conversation between us. where are you? i just gotta meet you!

I want to know, why is it so hard to find you? to meet you?
why you're so anonymous?
I need to know ... are you available for me? will you spare your time for me?
why you gotta be so anonymous?

Gosh! I want to meet you ....
I want to hold your hands, i want to stare at your eyes ...
Come fast ... i'm in a rush with my limited time visit this time!

When i think about him, i get a rush! I really want to meet my Mr. Anonymous!
I'd only can see him with my close eyes, can i borrowed your time?
I tried to delayed the sunlight, everything i tried to tell you I failed to. Maybe I'll tell you another time, how he keeping me so pre-occupied?
I'm willing to pay for his time .. never mind!

Tell me what's going to be? just bring me the hook! ..










*please tell him*

.. stand by you ..

.. new year, i never found myself making any resolution for any year that i've been through. what i have in mind is only keep improving myself to be a better person in every single day.
but what i learnt during 2015 journey, was i need to be more patience through all what happened during my career and facing lots of faces in front of me. need to be more diplomacy toward all of the clients that i handled, need to accept every complaints every bad words from other toward me with an open mind. manage all the expectation with positive attitude.

when people see me in their perspective i just need to accept that people have their own judgment over me, which i can't control what others might think about me or feel behind my back. can't expect others to be good right? even me i have my own judgment over people (of course with my own angle)

Need to be more careful to choose with who i want to hang out with and with who i should get attached. nice people doesn't mean they will stay true behind me right? so, never assume good people in front of you will do good behind your back. Need to sharpen my instinct with those kind of people around me, fake people will always be the success one. Well, i might say a few sincere people will be succeed but those who stay fake i found it more survive in every situation.

Sportive is a must attitude that i need to maintain, it will keep me away from hatred and revenge to others. Since i'm not that ambitious over something, sportive is something that keep me away from competition with others that might harm others. Let God protect me from those attitude, i'm afraid i will harm people with my blunt attitude ...

be kind 2016 ..