.. each tears ..

We take a risk when we open our hearts because the truth is, if we open our hearts, we will get hurt. You can’t open your heart and not have some hurt because you’re in a human experience. Even if it’s the love of your life and you have many wonderful, deepening, growing, powerful years together, it’s a human experience and that person will pass over. Love takes courage. Be courageous

.. choices ..

“Everyone makes choices in life. Some bad, some Good. It’s called living, and if you want to bow out, then go right ahead. But don’t do it halfway. Don’t linger in whiner’s limbo.”

.. reality bites ..

“Human beings are funny. They long to be with the person they love but refuse to admit openly. Some are afraid to show even the slightest sign of affection because of fear. Fear that their feelings may not be recognized, or even worst, returned. But one thing about human beings puzzles me the most is their conscious effort to be connected with the object of their affection even if it kills them slowly within.”

It's like everybody never understand about the truth, until it is too late, that the more we try to avoid suffering the more we suffer, because smaller and more insignificant things begin to torture us in proportion to our fear of being hurt. I mean yes it feel safe when you can keep everything to yourself.

But, somehow it need to be said, or at least showing it off to certain people not to released the hidden feeling inside us, but just to share the feeling.

So, for today lesson I might say to myself “I will learn from myself, be my own student.”

.. me, myself and I ..

"False friends are like our shadow, keeping close to us while we walk in the sunshine, but leaving us the instant we cross into the shade"

It's true when people said that "true friends are hard to find" .. most of people will give their fullest attention when you are in the good condition, I mean when you have this, when you have that, when you own this when you own that...

But, when you loose some of it, only few people might stay. I just can't imagine if we loose all ... how many of them will stay and give you courage and support to face everything? NONE!

I've seen many people talk behind their friends back's whenever they feel pissed.. Yea yea.. I did that too, if I feel annoyed or intimidating by my friends. But, when the time is right I will throw it to my friends that I'm pissed before, but I control it by not leaving them behind me when they drowning.

For me, better to have few friends but with good quality, instead having lots of friends who always faking themselves in front of me. You will never guarantee what they might do to harm you behind your back. This kind of friends freaking me out.

Been with this kind of person many years ago. It's really freaking out, in front of me this person is acting like she's the sweetest friend, put her effort to be part of my "crowd" ... I always believe good people always have a fortune to sense when the bad people around. God give me that, even though I know for sure, I'm not that good thou. *evil grin*

Crying out loud over the phone, feel regret and ask for my forgiveness..while, a few second after she hang up the phone she's scolded me behind my back and throwing bad words over me. While I did nothing to confront or even defend myself over her. For me .. why bother. My level is way above her, I'm raised by parents who have high level of education and attitude, so I won't do anything stupid to disgrace it.

She never stop talking about many bullies, lies and all the hypocrite to against her
wrong doing over some people she might call "friends" all I can say it's sad to see her with her friends especially her parents who raised her with that kind of environment of hates and hypocrite.

That's why I keep saying to myself "I'M PROUD TO HAVE ENEMIES, IT SHOW I HAVE CHARACTERS"

... don't wait ...

'It’s not me you should be worried about. There are bad people everywhere. Even here.'
'Eehhmm... let me guess. You’d protect me, right?'
'If it came down to that, I guess you can protect yourself.'

I have nothing to say on that, but he surprised me.

I believe there’s a story behind everything. How a picture got on a wall. How a scar got on my face. Sometimes the stories are simple, and sometimes they are hard and heartbreaking. But behind all of my stories is always a story of it!
Because no matter how much a thing hurts, sometimes letting it go hurts even worse.

(my heart voice in the morning)

.. something missing ..

It’s been said that we just don’t recognize the significant moments in our lives while they’re happening. That we grow complacent with ideas or things or people, and we take them for granted, and it’s usually not until that thing is about to be taken away from you, that you realize how wrong you’ve been, that you realize how much you really need it, how much you love it.

I won't pray for an easy life. Perhaps, I might pray for the strength to endure a difficult one.

Even though I may want to move forward in my life, I may have one foot on the brakes. In order to be free, I must learn how to let go. Release the hurt. Release the fear. Refuse to entertain my old pain. The energy it takes to hang onto the past is holding my back from a new life

.. dreamland ..

" You know how when you were a little kid and you believed in fairy tales, that fantasy of what your life would be, white dress, prince charming who would carry you away to a castle on a hill. You would lie in bed at night and close your eyes and you had complete and utter faith. Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, Prince Charming, they were so close you could taste them, but eventually you grow up, one day you open your eyes and the fairy tale disappears. Most people turn to the things and people they can trust. But the thing is its hard to let go of that fairy tale entirely cause almost everyone has that smallest bit of hope, of faith, that one day they will open their eyes and it will come true. " - Meredith Grey

At the end of the day faith is a funny thing. It turns up when you don't really expect it. Its like one day you realize that the fairy tale may be slightly different than you dreamed. The prince charming, well, it may not be the one for you. And its not so important happy ever after, just that its happy right now. See once in a while, once in a blue moon, people will surprise you , and once in a while people may even take your breath away.

.. ask your own heart ..

“Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day; begin it well and serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense.”

Look upon a head, see through your back without turning back your head. Everything is waiting for you ahead not from your back.

.. stolen ..

Later that day I got to thinking about relationships. There are those that open you up to something new and exotic, those that are old and familiar, those that bring up lots of questions, those that bring you somewhere unexpected, those that bring you far from where you started, and those that bring you back. But the most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself. And if you can find someone to love the you you love, well, that's just fabulous.

(... you have stolen my heart ...)