.. un-told ..

"why can you trust people?"

i have my reason why i don't trust people, i know i might have some kind of standard that most people might not get it. well, i have my own way to judge people's performance.

i'm not saying i'm that good thou ... but, every time i give trust to people everything seems falls apart. and at the end i'm the one who has to sort things out and clean up the mess. is not that i don't like to clean all the mess thou ... but, the worst things is that people rely on me too much and it is not good for me ..

yea for me .. i'm trying to be selfish here. is not that i'm not enjoying when people look for me and i turn down their phone or their text or even their bbm and whatsapp thou .. but limitation is all i got i have my own limit for everything .. i'm not that patience to go through all pressure

i can be quite sometime, but most of the time i can get on my nerve easily .. this lips might say something that is not nice ... i don't mean harsh word but more in to sarcastic statement. because what i'm expecting is that people are born with their skills, their brain and their will to learn .. don't they??

.. News ..

Heard many good news this couple of weeks... Happy for them blessed to be part of their good bless.
Those news came with no prediction, with no warn, no 30 days notice. It just came ... Unexpected!

The miracles does happens... Well, not exactly miracle i may say, its more to be un-plan things in our lives, no matter what we need to be prepare for everything. Just like when i accidently knew someone called me with 'OVERRATED' on their subject.. Shocked! Of course ... I even talked to myself what is overrated ? Does this person ever know how i take care every tasks? And when time passed, i realize that person who said i'm overrated is not even better than me.

That's what i called un-planned, i wasn't supposed to know that this person talked about me behind my back right? This person even talked about my performane in front of many people who don't even know how i deal with my tasks, well i may say its going to make my performance in a deep sh*t ... But, again i get used to be celebrity where people talked about me behind my back.

Plan the un-plan things, thats what my dad always told me. In life we must prepare for everything. Reality bites ... It does!  Everybody will eventually against us no matter how good are we to people. Evil side of human can never be predict ... Once evil will always be an evil, because they always see a dark side of people, they never see any good in any body except themselve. 

Don't trust with the smile and the words that even come from this kind of person!

.. changes ..

having a good sleep for this past weeks is really brings me those moments. clear mind, clear thought and of course clear out the bad mood ... I'd always love to have a good sleep ... (*who doesn't)

now i realize, i often ignored some moments. i tried to ignore those signs those clues .. forcing myself just go with flow .. like the road signs, it surely will lead me to somewhere.

"life's all about moments, of impact and how they changes our lives forever. but, what if one day i could no longer remember any of them?"

well, honestly i love to remember everything that ever happened in my life. i love my life, and most of it i love being me! 

"the moment of impact. the moment of impact proves potential for change. has ripples effects fay beyond what we can predict. sending some particles crashing together. making them closer than before. while sending others spinning off into great ventures. landing them where you've never thought you've found them. that's the thing about moments like these. you can't, no matter how hard you try, controlling how it's gonna affect you. you just gotta let the colliding part goes where they may. and wait. for the next collision -- The Vow

.. how do you know ..

talking to myself  "i don't know if I have what it takes for everybody's regular plan" even though, i know we are all just one small adjustment away from making our lives work.

but somehow, most of people who keep talking about others can not be trust! they can change their words in a sec, this minutes they say this about that person, in another second they can say different things about different people ... *grasp*

I wish those people could delete everything they said as soon as they said it, because lately all i hear is people keep hiding their weaknesses and they keep whiny and needy ... perhaps they even wish they could delete everything that came up from their mouth.
Well, i guess the answer to that is STOP TALKING! deny any voices to what's falling apart. Because, for any words that came out from that mouth will surely come back to ourselves

Oh, well perhaps I don't have to understand, all i need to have is faith .. faith in myself!
i believe the signs of no sign it's a sign itself ...

.. foot print ..

I wanna leave my footprints on the sands of time, I know there was something, and that something that I left behind.for sure, I will leave with no regret!
I've done, everything that I wanted and it was more that I thought it would be .. so I will leave my mark so everyone will know .. I was here!
I lived each day, and I know that I meant something in somebody's life ... it will be on the proof that I leave, I made a difference (i guess?) and they will see. -- (I was Here -- Beyonce)
In those heart ache, the disappointment the argument, the guessing ... buried away  deep inside the mind of mine! Never care that much what others might say or think. From my perspective, those people are not even better than mine ...
I'm who I am .. I live with everything I trust and what I believe .. I ain't looking for any hidden opportunity and I'm not an opportunist one ...
I don't have any ambition to hurt anyone, or even worst stabbing anyone who came into my way. I'm a person with a sincere mind. I will say "I hate it!" when I hate seeing or hearing something I don't like, I even showing it from my expression... Trust me my expression won't lie!